My Life in Theatre Politics (Making Theatre in the Subculture of MUST)

So let’s say that you move to the big city after years of a small country hellhole, and you fall in with a really rad group of people. They’re all young, vibrant, professional theatre makers, and they’re all a good deal older than you. One of them has faith in your talent as an actor, and you get cast by some miracle and do a show with some fantastic people. It’s your first year of uni. These people (who you now think of as the Old Guard) move on from student theatre, and new ones come in. It changes your life.
That was me when I arrived in Melbourne in 2011. I don’t think that my experience is unique, especially at Monash. MUST is such a fantastic environment to be in as a university student and as a maker of theatre. People reading this who are expecting a gossipy bitch-post in response to some of the things that have happening recently are in for disappointment. I think MUST is a wonderful environment and is 99% populated with level-headed, intelligent theatre-makers.
That’s not to say it’s always been an easy place to make theatre. I’m writing some stuff down here because I want to articulate the environment in which I and others have attempted to create theatre in. I do not think the onus is on MUST (as an entity, as a organization, or as individuals) to somehow answer for this experience. This is not an accusation. On the whole I’ve had a lovely time. (Gee, can you tell from how many times I’m saying I’m not accusing anybody of anything that I’m trying to be careful?)
So, let’s fast forward a year to 2012, where there are a lots of MUST people of varied cliques and year levels. Some really wonderful theatre got made that year (as it does every year) and I did some really cool stuff in first semester. Then I launched roleplaying, and became head of that weird group of people who kept talking about vampires.
I get it. I have a strange hobby. I swear it’s very interesting, but for a while MUST was kind of off the radar for me because I was pretty obsessed. Problem was, you couldn’t turn that off. I came back to MUST at the beginning of third year to find that there was a fairly core group of first and second years (let’s call them Joy Division, I think that’ll pretty much make it clear what circle of people I’m talking about) and that, for whatever reason, I didn’t gel well with them, so I went into a bit of a hermitage.
The thing was, MUST had other problems. There’s been a lot of discourse lately around what is and isn’t okay to put in theatre – trigger warnings and other precautions, that kind of thing. Truth be told, I feel as though I should raise my hand and claim responsibility in part for a lot of that discourse being raised. I don’t regret my part in raising these issues though. See, the thing is, when running roleplaying games, you actually do have to be very careful about being sensitive, inclusive, safe – all of these things. When Vampire finished, a lot of the people involved were involved in MUST, and they saw the benefits – and the horrible issues – that are associated with trying to be sensitive, inclusive, safe, respectful. I think the benefits of striving for that kind of environment are worth trying for, but MUST has seen the teething issues crop up.
Anybody who’s thinking this is a cry to ‘stop the feminists’ is wrong. If you don’t think trigger warnings are an important conversation to have about the presentation of theatrical work, you are wrong. But I’m even more wrong right now, because I’ve fallen into the biggest trap that MUST has fallen into over the past year, and that is a tendency for everybody to obsess over telling everybody else that they are wrong.
I am just as guilty of this as everybody else.
Here are some of the things that people have felt the need to insist were ‘wrong’ over the past few weeks and months.

• Approaching YV is ‘wrong’ because she’s ‘biased against roleplayers’.
• Columbine was ‘wrong’ because the crew weren’t’ prepared to take on the project’.
• The girl who was triggered by the Columbine’s marketing was ‘wrong’ because she was ‘too sensitive’.
• Somebody on the internet is ‘wrong’ because he is straight, white, and disagrees with Brecht.
• Many people have had their opinion completely discounted at MUST because they are male or privileged.
• Likewise, people have had their opinion completely discounted at MUST because they identify as a feminist or a similar code of ethics.
• Recent shows have been deemed ‘wrong’ due to genuinely minor issues that could have been peacefully dealt with to the satisfaction of all.
• Recent shows that have been genuinely offensive and insensitive have been staged with absolutely no repercussions.

Chances are, you recognize one or two things on that list, and they make your blood boil. If you don’t recognize any of them, congratulations! You live on the nice side of MUST, and I’m glad. It must be really nice in there. If you recognize one, or two, or more, I think you’ll see that there’s a bit of an attitude problem.
Remember, I’m a hermit! I barely ever go to uni, and yet whenever I end up at MUST, things like this are discussed and contested around me, both online and in the space. I’m almost certainly part of the problem, but I’ve had a bit of a think and I’m working on identifying what the problem is.
I believe it has something to do with the culture that seeped into MUST after the destruction of the roleplaying groups and the social shake-ups that accompany transition of students to and from MUST. I think it has something to do with the fact that everybody knows that there are battle lines drawn, all the time. I think it’s the fact that even a year and a half on from the event, certain people won’t stay in a room with certain people, or certain people hate certain people, or certain people will never make theatre with other people again – and we all sit on it and smile and stew because there’s a culture of silence at MUST, a culture that suggests to us that getting involved in actual debate and discourse and interaction with one another isn’t worth the effort,  or is too dangerous or unpleasant.
I’m attempting to break that silence a little bit today. When I arrived at uni, there wasn’t a single person in the MUST space I could talk to. Then, there was a year where I could talk to EVERYONE. Now, I’m back at square one. I don’t really have anything to lose by making my position clear.
I don’t know what that position is yet. Maybe there’s no fix, and MUST will eventually just flush this out of its system. I do know that a political culture is an unproductive one to make theatre in – an internally political culture, that is. I believe that the MUSTers out there working for inclusive and interesting and dynamic and fascinating and creative and professional theatre would rather get on with it rather than having to watch their backs. The older ones are getting tired, and the younger ones are moving on. A year and a half is long enough to be sniping at one another, surely? We can effect change and make everybody happy without being so needlessly antagonistic.
Anyway, if anybody wants me, I’ll be sheltering in the ruins of my credibility with this manuscript. It was a good run while it lasted. Thanks for reading.

The Boardroom

Saul grimaced as he pushed the plexi-glass door open in front of him, but he wiped his face clean as he entered the climate-controlled environment of the Senior Management Board Room. Eleven chairs were placed around a solid oak table, and each chair was filled. Saul reflected on the oddity of being disappointed in a parent for showing up, but there it was; Angus Saul was not fit to direct a company, and that was an indisputable fact. He sat timidly in his oversized chair, and Saul could see that the last three years had not treated him well. Why, he wasn't so overwhelming after all. A husk of a man, even. That shack where he lives must be weathering him early. So much the better, in Saul's opinion. He flashed a quick grin to his father as he took the chair opposite, and Angus deigned him with a smile. They were going to be civil this time, it seemed.

The meeting opened, but Saul heard none of it. His eyes were on Angus, who appeared to be nodding off. Old habits died hard, though, and despite the old man's reticence, Saul knew his kin well enough to see through the ruse. His honed corporate instincts were screaming at him, and as Angus opened his eyes and coughed delicately, Saul shot to his feet.

"Ladies and gentlemen, I really must protest."

A general stirring and murmuring as the black-suited envoys of the upper echelons turned to face him. Some were on his side, he knew, and some would hold their peace, but he couldn't just sit there this time. Why couldn't he have stayed out in the country? Why couldn't he rot away in peace? Angus Saul was a relic of the past. The fact that he was given voice here was unthinkable.

"This man is present today to overturn the policy that I have pushed for these past few months. I can think of no other reason for him to be present, and I doubt that he'll deny it if I say it right out." Indeed, no sign of denial. Angus was smiling calmly. He looked tired around the eyes.

"Since I came of age, I have been instrumental in this company's success. This man may have been a founder, but he disappeared, ladies and gentleman. He's not in contact for months, years at a time. We allow him to attend the board meetings of his pleasure and sabotage plans that were years in the preparation, and for what? He simply returns to his shack in the woods with god only knows what to keep him amused, and leaves us to pick up the pieces!"

Anger. Too much. There were a few nods, but not enough. And now came the thunder...

"Sit down, son."

Saul sat. It was coming now, and there wasn't much point in denying it.

"The board is in agreement that my continued absence from the day to day affairs of this company allows this company to function better as a whole. My long sabbaticals are intended to keep my moral compass. I don't intend for a lot of corporate drones to drive my good name into the ground."

Corporate drones. Lovely. So that's what he thinks of you.

"I am using my status as director of this company to veto your suggestion for expansion. You know why I'm doing that, son. The short-term yield is great, but the long-term damage to this company's reputation would be...catastrophic. I cannot allow you to move this company in that direction. There are enough evil empires out there."

Look at him. That smug, withered bastard. He's ruined everything.

"However, since my son has raised the issue, I would like to request that the Board approve some staff for my personal use. I've spent my sabbatical drawing up some plans that I think will satisfy the company's short-term demands for the next several months, and pending the changes my son will undoubtedly require, I think we'll all find it agreeable."

Nods all around. Saul was stunned. What the hell was this? He usually swept in with a plan and enacted it! He wanted his son to look it over? Was this a sign that Angus wanted his approval? His opinion? Why did this matter so much to him? The bastard was fucking with him, that was it. He should have known.

"Thank you, gentlemen, ladies. I won't be back for thirteen months, at least. Keep a tight ship until I check in."

They all rose. He's off again, Saul thought. Father was a good imitation of Houdini after meetings. Round of handshakes, head for the doors, lighting a cigarette as soon as he's clear. Saul watched him go. He could have ambushed his father and asked, but he was fairly sure the answer would be unhelpful.

He had been pretty angry, after all.

.

Are you there?
YES.
I had a thought.
THIS OUGHT TO BE INTERESTING.
You're given the option between firing a bullet and copping it in the chest. You pull the trigger.
YES. I PULL THE TRIGGER.
Aren't you worried about what that might do to your soul?
NOT AS WORRIED AS I AM ABOUT WHAT IT'LL CERTAINLY DO TO MY CHEST.
Good point.
WHY SO THOUGHTFUL?
Something on Tumblr made me think about violence, and how it affects the human condition.
AND DOES IT?
Oh yes. They used the world endemic. I prefer to think of it as epidemic.
BUT YOU'D STILL PULL THE TRIGGER.
Oh, yes.
I SUPPOSE JUST BECAUSE YOU CAN SEE A THING IS BAD...
Just so. 
IT'S A NASTY, BRUTAL WORLD OUT THERE.
I am starting to suspect so.
STILL. CAN'T HELP HOW WE'RE MADE.
That is becoming more and more apparent as time goes on, actually.
I HAD A FEELING IT WOULD.