Heart's On Fire

My heart's on fire,

Or so I'm told.

I'll burn away

Before I'm old.

I'm a wandering pyre,

With a thirst I must slake.

I'm a scoundrel, a liar

and I've made a mistake.

But my heart is on fire,

And the smoke from my chest,

Spills out from my mouth

and it poisons the rest.

My heart is on fire,

And my soul is in shreds,

But the flames flicker higher

And find fuel in your heads.

Now our bodies are fire,

And we're burning at last.

But I hope, oh I hope

That the end isn't fast.

Slow

Applauding a writer is like kissing a prostitute. Sure, they've performed a valuable service and perhaps they've even shown you a new trick or two, but that doesn't mean you love them.

I thought of that line during intercourse. I'm not sure if that impacts the validity of that statement or not.

There's a slow degeneration here.

You wake up, you work hard - or not,

You poison yourself during the downtime.

I'm not quite sure why you have to do this,

but it makes the march forward bearable.

There's something about this that's sublime,

Draining bottles of wine,

Leaving nothing but piss and broken glass.

There's a slow degradation here.

There might come a time soon where you have to quit,

But you won't take that chance to stop.

A line in the sand will be drawn,

but you won't take the stand.

You say that you've got nothing to prove.

But the boy drinking scotch halfway across the city,

Well, he knows otherwise.

There's a slow depredation here.

You prey upon yourself to sustain yourself.

Keep knocking them back,

Inhaling the smoke,

and putting yourself back up on that shelf.

Damocles would be proud,

and you wish you were as brave -

but he, at least, was never loud.

There's a slow saturation here,

As you fill up with emotion,

but you'll drown it in toxins.

Each breath that's oxygen,

Isn't quite enough.

You're sustained by your death,

But your voice will ring clear.

Just don't slip so far down,

that there'll be nobody left to hear.

Honeyed Wounds

Oil from the Devil's wounds?

I'd bleed honey.

The children are all dying,

That's not funny.

I'd stab you in the throat,

For your money.

I can't stand another second without it.

But at least your hindering touch

keeps me intact.

I'm far too sober for this business.

I'll drink of dead men,

And get out of here alive.

And then I'll find some place to die where you can't see.

Masquerades

They came forth with moonlit steps,

With mocking, careless lips.

The savored saviours of the dark,

Like soulless, silent ships.

They all assembled up the stairs,

They watched the crimson kiss.

We watched as they were torn apart,

And then reborn in bliss.

And then at once we all uprose,

They groaned; and then we fled.

And then returned with weaponry,

And filled them all with lead.

Death abounds in masquerades,

Life departs with teeth.

The mask will slowly slip away,

And you'll see what's beneath.

And you will gasp, and turn away.

Too much for you to bear.

But they yet walk with moonless steps,

And catch you unaware.

Here I Am Again

Well, here I am again.

It's been months now and I still haven't learned.

You promised that you'd never hurt me, so how can this be bad?

It hurt for a while, and then it didn't, and now it does, and soon it won't.

I have to make a change. I need to make a change.

It'd be heaven without you and hell with you and both sound just fine.

But this purgatory in between -

Well, this isn't what I mean.

I trusted that you'd find your way eventually.

That you'd cut the ties and find your feet,

Or that you'd turn on a dime and love me again.

I never dreamed you'd be happy in between.

But that isn't what I mean.

What I mean is, I'm not happy living like this.

I want to tear this all down or live in it for real.

Is that so wrong?

I want you to tell me what it is and stand by it.

Or walk away right now and leave it all behind.

So pick one, because I can't.

I never can.

I never learn.

Here I am again.

Soon it won't again.

Two in a row, Jason.

You really should treat this as a bit of a wake-up call, you know.

Play

Keep telling yourself that

You're what you want to be.

I'm vibrant and powerful

And physically free.

You'll wander the night

With the corpse wind a-high,

You'll find solace in strangers

Who'll then pass you by.

There's a moment of weakness,

A blossom of shame,

And then all your weakness

Will pour down the drain.

I'm proud of my actions!

I'm proud of past,

I'm strong and I'm vibrant!

I know I can last.

Then you get home

And the rot will set in.

You'll get past the threshold

And be stared full of sin,

You'll forgive and forget

And you'll give him some space,

But it is done, it is over,

And you've lost the place.

Game Ends

"I use the words you taught me. If they don't mean anything any more, teach me new ones. Or let me be silent."

- Clov, Endgame

Everything amounts to zero,

Ceasing is reward,

We're waiting for a Nero

to burn it all down.

We don't laugh anymore,

We refuse.

Everything is keeping score,

Breathe abuse.

Soon we'll stop and start anew,

Set your watch.

The sky is green, the earth is blue,

Time to die.

Did he get to keep his son?

I don't know.

He didn't get to keep the sun,

He had to go.

Is she dead? Is he dead?

I hope not.

Was she just within my head?

I forgot.

It's time for the painkiller.

But we're out.

Everything's a brain killer,

God won't hear.