The Woman Who Thought She Was Ugly

Once upon a time there was a woman who thought she was ugly.

This woman lived all by herself in a shack in the middle of the woods, with nothing but a full-length mirror to keep her company. The shack was old and rickety, and the roof would blow and rattle in the wind at night. One day, the woman grew so weary of looking at her reflection in the mirror that she kicked her door in and set off into the forest in a towering rage.

“Woe is me!” she raged to herself. “I am so monumentally ugly! There is nothing on this earth that is as ugly as I am!” As you can see, this woman was prone to melodrama.

It came to pass that while walking in the woods, she was set upon by a hideous monster in the woods. She was not afraid of the ugliness of the monster, because she believed that her own ugliness was far worse – but the monster had sharp fangs, and pointed claws, and she began to fear.

“Stay away,” she warned the monster as it panted at her from the path. “I am far too ugly for you to trouble yourself with.”

“Ugly you are,” the monster growled, “but I am ugly too – and I will take what I can get!” And with that, the monster leapt upon the woman and had his way with her. After putting up with the horrible monster’s attentions for over an hour, the woman finally managed to beat the monster away. It fled into the woods, whooping with evil glee, and the woman felt disgusted. “I must be ugly,” she said to herself, “for a beast such as that to trouble with me.” And so it was that she continued on her way, shaking her head in sadness.

After walking for many hours, she stopped by a stream to quench her thirst and wash her face. Looking across the river, she saw another woman washing her hair in the stream. This woman was not particularly good-looking, but to the woman who thought she was ugly, she was beautiful indeed. “What a beautiful woman” the ugly-thinking woman thought to herself. “I shall steal away from here quickly, and not trouble her.” But as she made to leave, the hair-washing woman called out to her.

“Who are you, that wanders in this forest without a friend?” The hair-washing woman called.

“Nobody,” replied the woman who thought she was ugly. “Just an ugly, ugly person trying to walk through the woods.”

“You are very ugly,” said the hair-washing woman, “but I have an idea. If you will have sex with me, I will call you beautiful, and maybe you will feel better about your horrible ugliness.” The woman who thought she was ugly was so overjoyed at this suggestion that she tore her clothes off at once and leapt across the river. The hair-washing woman was equally keen on the idea, and they coupled for a while.

When it was over, the woman who thought she was ugly swam across the river again to retrieve her clothing, and when she turned back, the hair-washing woman had fled – not even bothering to dress before escaping. The woman who thought she was ugly was very sad. “I must be so ugly that she couldn’t even bring herself to pretend I was beautiful,” she said to herself, and she continued on her way, very weary after her adventures.

After walking for many more hours, the woman who thought she was ugly found herself in a land of ice and snow. The wind blew cruelly and stung her face, but she did not mind as she thought herself so ugly that the wind could only be an improvement. Not only was she melodramatic, she was foolish – and she soon became lost in the blizzard. After stumbling blindly about for some minutes, she found herself outside a windswept palace made of glittering frost. “I am far too ugly for a place like this,” she thought to herself, “but if I duck inside quickly perhaps nobody will see me.” And so she did.

Inside the palace there was absolutely nobody to be seen. The halls echoed with the woman’s footsteps and search as she might she could not find a single person. Finally, she thought to check in the throne room of the frozen palace, and there she came upon the Ice Queen sitting in state upon her crystal throne. The woman who thought she was ugly took fright and made to flee, but the Ice Queen beckoned her forward with a bony finger.

“Who are you, that enters my land of ice and snow?” the Ice Queen demanded imperiously.

“Just a very ugly woman who has lost her way, your Majesty,” the woman who thought she was ugly said with fear.

“You are very ugly,” said the Ice Queen, “but you may rest here for a time, and tell me how beautiful I am.”

Obediently the woman sat down at the feet of the throne and began to tell the Ice Queen of everything that made her beautiful. But the more she spoke, the less beautiful the Ice Queen seemed. Her fingers were bone-white and looked like claws, her cheeks were sullen and corpse-white, and under her ermine robes she looked to be very bloated and large. After a time of talking, the woman who thought she was ugly realized that the Ice Queen was not beautiful in the slightest, and when the Ice Queen finally fell asleep, frozen to her crystal throne, the woman who thought she was ugly made her escape.

The woman who thought she was ugly left the land of ice and snow, and found herself in a pleasant field. The sun had revealed itself once more and the woman felt a faint stirring of hope. There in the center of the field she came across a young man, and she was filled with fear, because she remembered the monster from the start of her long journey.

“Stay away,” she warned the man as she had warned the monster. “I am far too ugly for you to trouble yourself with.”

“Ugly?” the man replied. “You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen!”

The woman who thought she was beautiful did not believe him at first, but over many hours he managed to convince her that he was being serious. She thought him a very strange man at first, but as the days in the field grew longer and the young man continued to speak of her beauty, she started to accept that he was honest. She did not believe him, of course, because she knew herself to be very ugly, and over time she left him and travelled back to her home in the forest with the rickety roof and the full-length mirror.

Many years passed.

One day, the woman who thought she was ugly woke up and looked in her full-length mirror, as she did every morning to remind herself of her ugliness. But this morning, something had changed. The face that looked back at her out of her mirror was beautiful. Absolutely, soul-blisteringly, utterly and completely beautiful. With a cry of joy, the beautiful woman rushed out of her house and down the path. She could think only of finding that young man, who she had met in that field all those years ago, and showing him that she finally was as beautiful as he had said she was.

It came to pass that while running down the path in the woods, she was set upon by a monster. This monster was frightfully ugly, and somehow familiar. It had sharp fangs, and pointed claws, and the beautiful woman was afraid.

“Stay away from me, monster,” she said to it with fear, “for I am far too beautiful for you now.”

“You’re right!” the monster said, gnashing its teeth. “You are far too beautiful, and I will always be ugly.”

And with that, the monster loped off into the trees, and the beautiful woman felt pity for the ugly thing, because ugliness was all it was and all it deserved.

Continuing on her way, the beautiful woman came across a stream, and was looking upon her beautiful face in the water when she heard the sound of crying. Across the stream was the hair-washing woman from all those years ago, fully clothed again and crying pitifully.

“Hello,” said the beautiful woman. “I am very beautiful.”

“You are so beautiful,” sobbed the hair-washing woman, “and I am so alone! I ran away from an ugly woman many years ago, and married a man. He said he would call me beautiful forever, but now he’s run away from me!” And with that the hair-washing woman dissolved into tears, and the beautiful woman felt pity for her. “I wish I could stay and comfort you, but I have a long way to go yet,” the beautiful woman said, and left the hair-washing woman crying on the banks of the stream.

After many more hours of travelling, the woman came once again upon the land of ice and snow, and in the center of that land was the windswept palace of ice. “I wonder if the Ice Queen still rules over this land,” the beautiful woman thought to herself. And with that, she pushed the door open and entered the empty palace again, no longer afraid of being cast out for her ugliness.

Like before, there was not a soul to be seen, and the palace rang with the footsteps of the beautiful woman. Pushing open the huge doors of the throne room, the beautiful woman saw that the Ice Queen was still sitting on her throne – but the throne was encased in a huge block of ice.

“She must have frozen to death on her pedestal,” said the beautiful woman to herself, and she beheld the frozen face of the Ice Queen – a face that was revealed to be most ugly indeed. Quietly, the beautiful woman left the frozen palace and left the Ice Queen to rule over her empty, icy wasteland. Her goal was now in sight.

Finally, the beautiful woman came upon the field from her memories. She was very weary by this point, but she knew the end of her journey had come as the sun began to set. In the center of the field she found that young man from all those years ago waiting for her, and she cried out to him with all the strength she had after her long journey.

“Look! Look! I’m finally as beautiful as you said I was!”

The young man looked her up and down, and laughed out loud.

“Really? You don’t look any different to me.”